Accept no imitations
May edition
Introduction:
Ok, so maybe trying not to listen to punk music was a bad idea. It was almost as bad as that one time Jon decided to try and wake up at 7:00 am every day. I did last longer than one week though, but by two weeks Tim was back listening to punk. Anyway… Read the news, get ideas, and fall into a mud-puddle (It has been raining a lot in Northern Indiana and plus mud puddles are fun).
Current events: Well, the band Dispatch will be playing in Chicago at a block party. It is $10, so if you have time check them out. Tim also now has another email address, bowlofcheese@punkmusic.com. So if you can’t remember my other ones Tim has another one you can forget about.
National News: Mailboxes, postal workers, crazy liberal arts students. What do they all have in common? Illinois, Nebraska, Colorado, and other really boring States. That’s right, a crazy art student (is there any other type?) started planting bombs in mailboxes. Of course our great media institutions immediately blamed the band Nirvana and punk music. What does Tim think about it? Well, the art student was crazy, the media is crazy, and Bin Laden is crazy. Long live grunge and punk music, down with the media, crazy art students and Bin Laden should be dragged out in the streets and forced to live in Kansas or Canada, which ever one is more boring.
Technology news: Tim has no clue what is up with technology. HP and Compaq have merged. So two companies that make crappy computers have merged to make even crappier computers. I think that this will only make it easier for South African technocrats to flood our markets with cheap imitations of crappy computers. HP does make some good products but Compaq did suck. One less computer company, one less competitor, and one step closer to another monopoly.
Auto week: Cars, trucks, and planes. Which does Tim really need to buy? Tim really wants a plane. Preferable I would like a B-2, maybe a F-15, but since I do not have something like $30 million, yet (I almost have that much, only $29,999,999.99 to go). So if you would like me to own a B-2 or a F-15, please send me money.
Living Conditions: Living at home. Living at home. Living at home? How long does it take for time to go insane while living at home? Not long. I am bored out of my fucking mind, and am sick of my parents.
Work: Tim really hates my job now. It is not because, of my working conditions, it is because of my stupid company has hired a new intern to work in the research lab. This intern has no qualification, he is a liberal arts student at Ball State (he is a theater major), and the only reason why he is working in the research lab over the summer is because his dad is a VP. He gets paid as much as I do and he also gets better jobs because his dad comes over to our department and makes sure his son has easy, interesting jobs to work on while I get stuck with the shitty ones. In conclusion, I hate the working world, hate people that abuse their power, and I hate the new intern (he is almost exactly like my old roommate, almost exactly, even down to his video game addiction and his hatred of music).
Internship Opportunities for You: All of you got screwed by my company, see reason above.
Social Life: I have no social life. Tim is thinking about getting one. I was at my sister’s induction into the nation honor society the other night and Tim realized how much he missed my old friends from high school. Now if I only knew where they lived or worked these days. Eventually, I am sure of it, Tim may stumble upon them. I do not even think my friends from high school even know that I listen to punk music. Tim has also realized he is really bad at asking young ladies out on dates. Tim needs a date, or at least a young lady to hang out with and go to concerts with.
Music: Crappy songs on the radio and bands releasing crappy singles. Are you tired of crappy songs and crappy bands? Well I don’t care. But in case you feel like listening to the crappy bands I listen to here is a short list:
Rank Song Album Artist
1 Sunny Hours “Wonders of the World” Long Beach Dub Allstars
2 Underneath it all “Rock Steady” No Doubt
3 Power of Moonlight “II: Power of Moonlight” Tiger Army
4 The Despair Factor “The Art of Drowning” A.F.I.
5 Not Giving In “Pray For Mojo” Mustard Plug
5 Left and Leaving “Left and Leaving” The Weakerthans
There was tie, I know, I just could not make up my mind what was the better cd, so both of them made the list. Anyway, I am still listening to ska, reggae, and punk and in the end isn’t that the only thing that really matters (well No Doubt is actually a new wave rock band with ska and reggae influences but we can forgive them for that). Dispatch did not make it this month, but they are still and awesome band. Please support these bands by downloading their music, most even offer mp3s on their websites.
Will I still be listening to these cds next month? Stay tuned…
Messages to people: I have no clue if I have any messages to people. So if you want to talk to me my AIM name is: agaldor
Passage From a book (to increase your culture):
“ ’My friend,’ said the orator to him, ‘do you believe that the Pope is the antichrist?’
‘I have never heard that before,’ replied Candide; ‘but whether he is or not, I have no bread.’
“You do not deserve to eat any,’ said the other. ‘Hence, scoundrel; hence, wretch; never come near me again in your life.’”
From “Candide” by Voltaire
(disclaimer: all these books have been read by Tim and do not express the ideas or beliefs of Tim.)
Editorials:
(If you would like to see your editorial in the Tim Newsletter send it to me and I’ll put it in my next issue)
Goodbyes:
Adios, Auf Weidersehen,
Tim